Have really noticed in the past week or so how I am in a place so not like the place I would like to be during Advent.
I am stressed with all the million things to do, inpatient, hurrying around to who knows where. It is hard not to get caught up in the commercialism and craziness of the secular side of the Advent/Christmas season.
However, perhaps most disturbing, is when I go to mass and find myself thinking of those million other things...shopping, presents, cooking, baking, work, etc etc etc...my mind seems to be everywhere but where it should be, focusing on Christ coming to earth in the Eucharist which I am so blessed to receive.
Today was no different...I found myself making sauce, Christmas shopping and wrapping presents during the mass..when I realized it in the middle of the consecration,I became upset with myself and asked Jesus to forgive me. It was then that I realized, once again, that it is ok as long as it is not intentional and I pull myself back. I am a sinner. I cannot even be faithful without His grace, that is why he came to earth and comes to us in the Eucharist...Because we are incapable of anything without Him.
God is so amazing...yes, I am a sinner. I get distracted and I run in a million directions getting caught up in all the 'stuff', because I am human. A human born with original sin, who continues to sin and will all through my life, though please God, not mortally. More then that, God is God,and He came to earth precisely for that reason, because He knows I am a sinner and He loves me.
Yes, even in the distractions of Mass He calls us back to Himself and shows us the enormity of His mercy, in never leaving us alone, even when we may be a million miles away.
Ron Becher -photo