Because prayer at the foot of the Cross deepens the vision of ones sinfulness as well as faith in the love of God. Your evil was conquered and erased by virtue of the redemptive sacrifice of Christ. Through the power of the One whose love for you has no limits you were redeemed. In adoring the Cross you will realize this ever more fully. (In the Arms of Mary, SC Beila)
“Through the power of the One whose love for you has no limits, you were redeemed”
A love without limits! That is hard for us to imagine because our human love is often filled with tons of limits.
• I will love you if …
• I don’t love you anymore because…
• How can I love you when …
• If you do this it is over
• I did not sign up for this…
.How many of us may have had limits manifested to us before we chose abortion?
• If you love me you will abort
• If you do not abort I will leave
• If you do not abort you cannot finish school/keep your job, etc. etc
Our human love seems to have more to do with getting for ourselves, than giving of ourselves.
I used to hate the cross. It scared me. I felt guilty for putting Jesus there and it reminded me of all I was not and my total sinfulness. I was completely focused on self instead of all He was and his, sinless and mercy for me.
It also seemed completely impossible for me to meet what I thought were the expectations of Christ. I was too weak, too fearful, too sinful, too needy and ignorant of how to even begin to live the life I felt He was asking of me. I always felt like I had to be a certain place before I went to Him. I never realized that it was by going to Him that I could reach that place.
While a part of me longed for relationship with Him, I had no inkling of this love He offered. A love that willingly died on the cross. A living love, right here, right now.
Christ’s love challenges us to grow, to step away from ”self”. The paradox of our faith, by giving ourselves up, we get fulfillment. It is hard to digest.
Most of us aborted because of “self” whether it was pure self interest, or self preservation it still was about self. That can be hard for us to admit. But it is in entering into all the feelings and doubts and fears that caused us to abort, that we will find peace and fulfillment. But I will get back to that.
I have been thinking lately, about how much suffering there is in the world. We run around too busy for most things. We have forgotten how to relax and rest in the Lord. So many people have so many crosses, unemployment, addiction, illness, and so many people feel so alone and abandoned. They are so busy looking to fill self, they forget that they get filled by emptying self, by being there for others.
We are so afraid to suffer with others, afraid that it will touch our supposed neat little worlds. I was afraid to give of myself when I had my abortion. Afraid if I had my baby I would not survive in this world. Abortion is the ultimate clinging to self...the denying of life thinking it will preserve us, when in reality it not only takes the life of our child, but all we were meant to be.
We are all adverse to suffering. Even in our healing we want it here and now. We look for a quick fix, as if there could possibly be one. Just think of how awful it would be to be able to take the life of our children and get over it right away. What kind of a person would we be? I have always said I am glad my abortion bothered me. I would never want to take the life of my child and be ok with that. That is scarier to me than what I have gone through.
So,how can Jesus forgive us after He suffered so much and died for my sins? Fact is we are already forgiven precisely because he died for our sins.
The journey to healing is a dying to self. Do not be afraid on your journey. God will not leave you to walk it alone, He will be with you every step of the way.
He already knows we are all sinners.He knows every saint has his past and every sinner has his future.
"The Cross is the way to Paradise, but only when it is borne willingly."--------St. Paul of the Cross
"In uniting yourself to God's will, you take on new life and gather great courage, willingly embracing the cross and kissing His hand even when it chastises you, a hand that reaches out to you in love and has no other intention but your greater spiritual well-being." --------St. Paul of the Cross`
I am continuing to learn a lot about the cross. It may not be my idea of what a cross should be (and we all have our acceptable crosses don’t we?) But the cross we want and the one we get are most probably going to be very different. Embracing it is the ultimate task of continually letting go and trusting God. I know I do better some days than others.
Mary has been teaching me. Her cross was to see her son suffer.She did not tell him what he should have done, what to say or not say.
• Why didn’t you stand up to Pilate and Herod
• Why not come down from that cross and show them who you are
Instead, she trusted God knew He had to do this for our salvation. She quietly stood there supporting and loving him
Not easy ! We want to take control and make things into what we see as right. It is often hard for us to keep our mouth shut
All we can do is trust in God's love and that it is for my salvation, teaching me to grow in love and trust .A long suffering pushing our faith.
One of the most intense parts of the Entering Canaan ministry is that to the siblings of aborted baby's. I must admit, sometimes it is hard to hear their pain, these women and men who had nothing to do with the choice to abort , yet whose lives were touched so profoundly. I think of the verse “Choose life, that you and your descendents may live”.
These days experience great pain and suffering of the magnitude of the impact of abortion on so many lives, yet, through the cross and sharing in the suffering of Christ, He makes manifest His great love and mercy. At the end of the retreat sitting at mass you can not help but notice the great peace and joy. A joy in sharing the suffering, of giving of self. Ultimate pain and ulitmate love in the same place.
The Paradox of our faith.
I am so blessed. I meet God every day in the women and men we minister to. I don’t always”love” it. I am weak and the human side of me can still suffer with suffering, but I also love the suffering,because it is there at the cross that I encounter Christ and His great love for us. It is there I find the strength to continue and bear this life's sufferings, and, it is there I found healing from my abortion
"We adore You oh, Christ and we praise You, because by Your Holy Cross You have redeemed the world!"
