Reclaiming Our Children

Future Spouse and Abortion

This article from the National Catholic Register is from 2012, but worth repeating, as we always get calls from people finding out that the person in their relationship has had an abortion.

Abortion impacts us all.

When Couples Struggle With the Deep, Dark Secret of Past Abortions (673)

Let sleeping dogs lie? Or reveal it so the marriage will be based on truth? A Catholic post-abortion counselor offers advice.

 

by THERESA BONOPARTIS 05/10/2012 Comments (1)

– Edw/Shutterstock.com

In the sacrament of marriage, couples promise to love one another “for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish ...”

“For better or for worse” would seem to include the ugliness of our sins.

In making this commitment, we are free to be our true selves and to learn and grow in the love of God, trusting that the other person will always be there for us — even when, in our human weakness, we fail.

There are varied opinions as to whether a person needs to disclose a prior abortion to their future spouse before marriage. Some feel that if one does not, the marriage is not based on truth; while others advise, “Let sleeping dogs lie.”

Read more: http://www.ncregister.com/daily-news/when-couples-struggle-with-the-deep-dark-secret-of-past-abortions/#ixzz1uTeAkjaB

Divine Mercy Documentary

Please join us for an evening of fellowship for those at work in the Abortion Healing Ministry.  On Saturday, October 8, 2016, we will watch Divine Mercy, the film, with sharing and discussion to follow.  Please RSVP by October 5th by calling Maureen Ciardiello at 203-416-1445 or email to [email protected].  We look forward to seeing you there!

 

 

Save

The Justice Foundation

If you have never heard of them, you should become familiar with wonderful work of  The Justice Foundation.

One of their main ministries is Operation Outcry which exposes the truth of the harm of abortion, especially through the testimonies of women and men. The declarations of Operation Outcry women have been instrumental in legislation, including cases at the Supreme Court.

If you have not filled out a Declaration, please consider doing so. If you do not want your name public, you can specify that.

Another great resource is Center Against Forced Abortion, which provides letters to those who feel they are been coerced into abortion by parents.  As someone who experienced just that, I am so happy to see this resource available. Let's do what we can to get this information out to Crisis Pregnancy Centers and others and let those being coerced know they are not alone.

Below is an excerpt from The Justice Foundation website:

The Justice Foundation’s “Center Against Forced Abortions” or “CAFA” was created to provide legal resources to mothers who are being forced or coerced into an unwanted abortion.

To download resources to help mothers who are being forced to have abortions, click on links below:

• Dear Parent Letter
• Dear Parent Letter – Heartbeat
• Dear Client Letter
• Life Dynamics Fax to Abortionist
• Dear Father Letter
• Dear Parent Letter (Spanish)

For more information or to talk to a lawyer, call (210) 614-7157 or email [email protected]

Problem

• Many teenage girls are being coerced into abortion by their parents
• Pregnancy resource centers are generally unequipped to help legally defend these clients, and subsequently coerced abortions occur
• Even under Roe v. Wade, the decision to keep the child is supposedly the woman’s alone, so theseyoung women’s rights are being violated when they are coerced into abortion

Response

• The Justice Foundation has created a “Dear Parent Letter,” which (in a friendly, helpful, and serious manner) informs the teen mother’s parents that they could be guilty of illegal actions if they force their daughter to have an abortion
• Combined with Life Dynamics’s Letter to Abortionists, which is a signed statement indicating the mother’s non-consent to an abortion, the two documents form a powerful legal defense that empowers the teen mother to stand for her child

Effectiveness

• Gives pregnancy centers a proven strategy to defend teens from parentally coerced abortions
• Equips the teen mother with legal documents empowering her decision to keep her child
• Trial distributions indicate the strategy is very effective (testimonies below)
• If just one baby is saved at two out of every three pregnancy resource centers that receive the letter and training, then CAFA will facilitate the protection of 2,000 babies lives

Mother Teresa

As we approach the canonization of Mother Teresa on September 4th, I thought I would just post these few words of hers that say so much, especially in light of the upcoming election and how abortion was celebrated at the Democratic National Convention.

Mother Teresa, pray for us and for our country!

Save

Men & Abortion, Day of Prayer & Healing

Are you, or a man you know, suffering the loss of a child through abortion?

The message of abortion is confusing for men. They are told it is a “woman’s choice” and that they have no rights regarding their unborn child. It is true. Men have no legal rights in the abortion decision.  Yet, if a woman aborts and then suffers, men often feel as if they failed her by not protecting or stopping her! No Wonder it is Confusing!

Some men use abortion as a means to avoid responsibility for their actions.  Others did not want their child to be aborted, were willing to take responsibility, but were unable to prevent the abortion.  Some men are married to women who suffer as a result of a past abortion and her struggles affect the relationship.  Some men don’t recognize what they have done until they have future children. 

• Did you pressure a woman to have an abortion?
• Were you against the abortion?
• Did you go along with an abortion because you thought you had no say and wanted to support the woman?
• Did someone else pressure you both to have an abortion?
• Did you find out about an abortion after the fact?
• Is the woman you are now married to or with, post abortive?

You are not crazy or alone! There are countless men who are suffering just like you are. You have a right to your feelings.  You have a right to reclaim your fatherhood and your children.  Begin your healing journey with the Entering Canaan Men's Day of Prayer & Healing, Saturday, October 29, 2016.  Please call 1-877-586-4621 or email [email protected] for information and details.

 

 

Save

Save

Save

Save

Retreat Weekend for Siblings of Aborted Babies

"I think that it would be good for people to know that we all suffer from abortion.  It is not something that affects just the mother or the father over time.  I have not forgotten my siblings and I never will.  I miss them although I never knew them.  I cannot get it out of my mind and I pray for my mom, my dad, and my siblings every day."  KT

Are you suffering because your sibling has been aborted?  There are millions of others out there who have also experienced this loss.  you are not alone.  Come begin your healing journey September 23-25, 2016.  Hosted by the Diocese of Bridgeport, Connecticut, and led by Spiritual Director, Fr. Fidelis Moscinski, C.F.R., the weekend retreat will include witnesses, conferences, adoration, the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass, sharing, and reconciliation, all with people who know and understand what you are experiencing. 

Scholarships are available for the retreat and for transportation.  For further information email [email protected] or call 877-586-4621.

 

ScSave

Save

Save

Save

Assumption of Mary

Many years ago in 1988, I attended a Celebration for the Assumption of Mary at the Don Bosco Shrine in Haverstraw, New York.  His Eminence, John Cardinal O'Connor, was the Celebrant & Homilist.  It was probably about the third year of my return to the Church and I was growing in my relationship with God and my healing from my abortion.

It is funny how certain days stick out in your mind. This was one for me. Little did I know at that time I would come to know Cardinal O'Connor and that he would be instrumental in giving me a platform to develop "Entering Canaan" by his founding of the Sisters of Life. I can remember listening to his homily about Mary and being so grateful for the graces that were present in my life.

Although I still struggled with some post abortion issues, I was falling in love with Jesus and His Mother and moving in trust of His promises.

I have a great devotion to Our Blessed Mother. I don't always "feel" it and I know at times I take her for granted just as most do with their earthly mother.  But, I also know she is always there protecting me and guiding me to her Son even when I do not feel her presence.

1988 was also the year I consecrated myself to Mary through "True Devotion."  As I have said many times before, I am totally convinced that without Mary the "Entering Canaan" Ministry would not exist. She is my mainstay and my daily anchor to Christ in which, to the best of my ability, I follow the life of consecration each day.

As I think of the Assumption of Our Lady, my heart fills with joy and gratitude. What a Glorious Day that must have been!

Blessed Feast of the Assumption!

I am all Yours and all that I have belongs to You, Oh Most loving Jesus, through Mary, Your most Holy Mother!

Save

Jesus Christ of the Bathroom Floor

I admit it. Although I have a great love of the Eucharist and have been attending daily mass for decades, I often find myself in any place but church when I am there.

In this busy world where we are seldom “off” because of expectations (our own or others), and social media, without even realizing it I find myself at the grocery store, doing the endless work that needs to done or lining up my day in my head, totally missing the readings or even the homily.

It can be a constant struggle. Even if I manage to become conscience of it and pull myself back it is not long before I am gone on another excursion. It is so hard nowadays to stay in the present moment, in and of itself not good, but particularly upsetting when I am at mass.

It reminds me of young children who cannot hold their attention to things for long. They often ignore the things before them always looking for the next challenge or occupation of their minds. I remind myself I am really no different than that child, and I console myself with the fact that like human parents pull their kids back and assist them in gaining virtue; Mary does the same with me.

I have tried to become more aware of myself at mass. I know that God knows, as imperfect as my love is, I do love Him, and that is why I seek Him out each day.

One thing I have found that unites me with Him intimately more than anything is always remembering He is the same Jesus I met in my healing. The one who took pity on me after hours of calling out to Him in agony on the bathroom floor. The one who came down, and touched my heart and soul in a profound way freeing me, after years of suffering from the bondage of abortion.

So, no matter how much I have strayed during mass, or no matter how many times I have had to pull myself back, as the consecration begins, I always remind myself that He is coming…that same Jesus , to meet me in my soul in that intimate place of love, forgiveness and healing where I can still feel His touch.

Jesus, I trust in You!

I don’t like feeling out of control

I don’t like being pressured

I don’t like feeling out of control  

I dislike self centeredness

I do not like aggressiveness

I hate it when I feel I am not being heard or my feelings do not matter 

I get upset when I feel used

I hate being lied to or made to feel like I am crazy because I have been mislead

These are some of my “abortion connectors”. Situations in which the trauma of my abortion surfaces because of the coercion that took place in order to get me to abort. They are painful feeling, much more painful than the situation occurring in the present because they bring me into the past.

When I find myself overreacting to certain situations, I have learned to step back and take a look.  Is this a reaction to the present, or am I overreacting because I am being brought to that place of total abandonment and isolation and feeling completely out of control of my own life and situation.

The loss of control, and frankly bullying, that caused me to give in to aborting my son still lingers somewhere inside of me and probably always will in this life. I use to beat myself up all the time for giving in and relinquishing my life and the life of my unborn son to the pressures of people who were suppose to love me. Whatever their failings, like many of us in our human weakness, their fears became more powerful than the love they were suppose to have for me. It took me years before I could feel sorrow instead of anger for them. It only finally happened by the grace of God.

Abortion connectors can be very powerful. They can chart our lives if we do not learn what our personal connectors are, and work at healing and abating their power. This is hard to do without the support of those who know post abortion healing, whether that is a professional counselor, a ministry or others who have made the journey. It also takes a knowledge of the dynamics of abortion and most importantly a  trusting relationship with God(one step at a time), who gives us the perimeters  to keep us on course as we delve into the deep pain we may be holding on to,

It is only through walking through our experience,  coming to understand what happened and facing our connectors, that we can forgive, be forgiven and learn to live with joy again.

It is worth the journey!

The Goodness of God

Although  we are located in an office in the Bronx, NY and do little advertising, the ministry of Lumina reaches across the world.

I am very blessed to communicate with people from the US, Africa, Croatia, Europe, India and everywhere else you can think of that find us through our web site at Lumina/Hope & Healing after Abortion.

One very great blessing has been to communicate over the past few years with a woman from Croatia.  She struggled, as many women do, with abortions she had in her past, in spite of the fact that she had gone to the sacraments. Although I have never met her, I consider her a friend through our correspondence over the years. As we planned for our "Entering Canaan Mercy Retreat" in Medjugorje last year, she had hopes of joining us and I looked forward to finally meeting her.

As it turns out, she became pregnant with a high risk pregnancy, and again, like many women, feared she was being punished for her past abortions. Over the course of the pregnancy ,she has been in and out of the hospital, often times thinking she would never be able to bring her unborn baby to term.

Since this made it impossible for her to join us on our retreat, those of us who made the journey to Medjugorje adopted her and her unborn child in prayer. Although she was not able to be with us physically we carried her in our hearts as we participated in our retreat.

This woman's faith in spite of her fears over the course of her pregnancy, was so beautiful to witness. In spite of her "feelings" and the temptations  to believe she was being punished, she perservered and trusted in the mercy and forgiveness of God.

I am so happy to share that she gave birth to a beautiful healthy little girl!

Jesus, in spite of our struggles, our weaknesses, our doubts, and temptations to despair, we trust in YOU and we thank you for the gift of forgiveness you give us and the many graces You bestow upon us. Thank you Lord for the gift of this little girl!

Jesus, we trust in You!