When the words came across the bottom of the television screen that Ruth Ginsberg had died I was filled with mixed emotions. If I am going to be completely honest, there was a part of me that felt relief that now we could get a pro life judge on the court and end some of the slaughter of the innocent unborn by overturning Roe s Wade. The other part of course, felt sorrow and a host of other emotions, some of which I cannot even articulate. I was particularly disturbed that her last wish was that she would not be replaced "until a new president is installed", I have no doubt this wish was because of her fear of the overturning of Roe vs Wade. Still, I was shocked that even at deaths doorway this was her priority.
When I went to mass the next day, I offered my communion for Ruth Ginsberg's soul , and then, as is my usual practice, I headed out to the adoration chapel for my Holy Hour.
As I was sitting before Jesus, I was suddenly struck with the thought of Judge Ginsberg face to face with the reality of the millions of babies who have died. I also thought of all the women who have died from "safe, legal" abortion, those who committed suicide, and the countless numbers of those who have been hurt, many sitting in silent suffering all alone. I thought of the men who lost children, and all the siblings suffering the loss of a brother or sister, and others who have and are currently experiencing abortions devastation. There are millions.
I cannot even imagine the immensity of what Ginsberg must now face, the reality of abortion. No more hiding behind the rhetoric of "women's rights" or "choice", but only the stark truth of what abortion is, and what it must be like for her to see the result of her actions. It is beyond terrifying.
Then, as I was sitting there, I got a sense of all the millions of babies gathering around her. They were weeping, not for themselves but for her, and trying to comfort her as they saw her in the torment of her self made hell. Filled with the love of God they were saddened by what she was experiencing and her rejection of the truth of God.
I also felt so grateful to have have been given the gift of acknowledging my sin in this life, to feel contrition and to receive from God the grace to heal. Even though it has been painful, I have been blessed to look at the reality of abortion, my abortion, all abortion, in the light of Christ's love, mercy and forgiveness. I am also filled with gratitude for the many women, men and siblings who have come to the Entering Canaan Ministry and others for healing and are on the road to Canaan, to the joy and peace of Christ.
I don't know what happened to Judge Ginsberg in her final moments. I pray she somehow repented and was filled with contrition for her role in the millions of deaths since the passage of Roe vs Wade. I do know, I forgive her for my pain, as do the babies and many others, and that I will continue to pray for her in the hope that the mercy and love of Christ, always waiting for us and inviting us in, touched her soul before she parted from this world.