Reclaiming Our Children

Swimming Against the Current

 

I have spent a great part of my life swimming against the current, trying to feel the love of God and radiate the joy I’ve seen manifested in others.

I’ve struggled with the love of God the Father. I was told and felt from my beginnings I was unwanted and of course I felt unloved. When I was a teen, I became pregnant and was kicked out of the home, abandoned, and then coerced into an abortion. It was, I believe, the cumulation of all I had been experiencing up until then. They now had an excuse to get rid of me-the child they never wanted.

We don’t often recognize the ways in which these experiences impact our lives. Eventually I found my faith, Gods love and mercy and had healing from both my abortion and an abusive marriage where I was also abandoned.

As grateful as I have been for a multitude of gifts, He has given me, there has still been that part of me that screams “NO” to a total surrender to His love. A part of me is terrified to trust and terrified of being abandoned again.

I have tried to sit in the love of God, to concentrate on the love instead of the suffering, but for me the suffering is where I find the love.

Some people relate to God through the love they have been given and felt with confidence through their lives. It is where they meet and love Him-an incredibly beautiful thing.

I have tried to experience that, but it is painful because I don’t relate, so it just magnifies all I did not have and leaves me feeling all the ways I have always felt-unlovable, unwanted, and alone.

I find God in the suffering. Jesus knows what its like-the abandonment, the loneliness, the rejection, tossed out and unloved. This is the place where we meet, and I experience His love, even His joy.

One of my biggest struggles is not wanting to need people-because of my experiences. I am very self-reliant, but I am trying to learn to trust. There is a fine line for me between healthy detachment and an excuse not to allow myself to be vulnerable, to need anyone, including God.

Recently as I struggled through trusting with someone, I found myself feeling and saying to them, “I am sorry for being such a burden-for always bothering you.”

It was so striking to see clearly that this is how I think of myself still on some level. I also see that this thinking gives me an excuse not to trust and not to love.

In my suffering with Christ, I know I am not a burden. He waits for me each morning in adoration and I am so grateful to be with Him. He gazes at me and loves me in my brokenness that He totally understands, and I gaze at Him and love Him, grateful for His presence in my life.

I am learning I need to stop trying to be what I am not. I need to stop swimming against the current. As in a riptide I need to surrender to the power of the current and continue to allow God’s love and providence to come to me in the suffering bringing me safely to heavens shore where I won’t feel fear or suffer anymore.

Kingdom of God

 

This is a homily by Fr Francis Mary, CFR about the Kingdom of God.

It particularly struck me because it speaks of so many issues in healing from abortion (and many others things) that keep us from the love of God and trust in His goodness.

How many of us feel like we need to be in control because our abortions made us feel so out of control?  How many of us build walls around our hearts to protect ourselves because of deep hurts or because we are filled with fear.

What keeps you from the Kingdom?

May we pray for our hearts to be freed - to surrender to His will in trust!

Great homily! (click below)

 

 

 

27 June_24_His Will His Kingdom (1)

 

The Journey of Healing

I've never done too much to promote the book of meditations I wrote "The Journey to Healing Through Divine Mercy" on healing from an abortion. It was published by The Marians about 6 years ago now and they pretty much do the promootion in their,catalog etc. I just always pray that it is out there helping people to heal- letting them know they are not alone, but mostly helping them come to the Divine Mercy of God and His desire for our healing.

Every once in a while He remnds me its out there through an email or letter from someone who somehow has gotten their hands on it.

I received one of those recently: "I am on my third read of your book. It is truly a work of divine literary through the Lord." GF

I am grateful to be reminded that it is out there continuing to help people in their healing. MAy He continue to use it according to His will as wounded souls come back to Him embracing HIs mercy & love.

That Old Catholic Guilt

One thing that amazes me is the continued attempts by those in the pro-abortion movement to make everyone believe that suffering from an abortion comes from guilt because of a person’s faith.

They repeatedly try to make abortion a religious issue instead of the human rights issue it is.

Oftentimes, we have been put on the defensive with this line of thought. I think that is a mistake. I refuse to apologize for the role my faith plays in my life when it comes to abortion or any other issue, but this still does not make it a religious issue.

My mom suffered from Alzheimer’s for years. It was a great trial for those of us who cared for her. She was gone long before she physically died. It was my faith that got me through those times. No one says Alzheimer is a religious issue.

Because of a personal abortion I had as a teenager, I picked a poor spouse. I did not think I deserved to be loved or treated well by anyone. The marriage ended in divorce, and I raised my two sons on my own with no support. My faith got me through. No one calls single parenthood a religious issue.

I can continue with numerous examples of faith in my life. There is no doubt it has seen me through some hard times and some joyous times. It is part of who I am, but it is not why I suffered psychologically after my abortion. I suffered, because I took the life of my unborn child.,

Years ago a student from Berkley’s School of Journalism asked me if I felt guilt from my abortion once I returned to church. I replied that “NO, it was not on my return to church, it happened when I saw my dead son lying on the bed as a result of a saline abortion.

Most women do not see their aborted child. They are shieled from the horror, but they know just the same what it is that has happened. How is it that pro aborts think faith can instill guilt, but a dead child, a death you have participated in cannot?

No, it is not my Catholic faith that made me feel guilt and shame and all the other emotions I lived with for years, it was my innate call to motherhood. In fact, it was my faith that saved me and helped me to heal and be whole again, and I will never apologize for that!

Poland PIlgrimage - full of grace & healing

 

 

Warsaw by Theresa Bonopartis

 

"Entering Canaan" Synopsis

“I WILL BE WITH YOU AS I WAS WITH MOSES: I WILL NOT LEAVE YOU NOR FORSAKE YOU. BE FIRM AND STEADFAST. . . . DO NOT FEAR NOR BE DISMAYED, FOR THE LORD, YOUR GOD, IS WITH YOU WHEREVER YOU GO.” Joshua 1: 5-6, 9b

 

Like the Israelites who traveled for forty years before reaching the Promised Land, those who have experienced abortion often “wander in the desert” of suffering for years. Our Entering Canaan post abortion ministry is multi faceted; the “Day of Prayer and Healing” begins their healing journey.

 Day of Prayer and Healing provides a safe, loving and prayerful environment. The theme of the day is taken from the message of Divine Mercy: “Jesus, I Trust in You.” The goal for the Day of Prayer and Healing is that each retreatant leaves the day with hope that healing is possible.

 The Days are followed by our monthly Gatherings which consist of a half hour meditation before the Blessed Sacrament followed by a shared discussion. The Gatherings provide an opportunity for these women and men to form a community among themselves, to face fears together and to help one another gain the tools necessary for identifying and responding to personal battles and “abortion connectors”: seemingly ordinary events/sounds, etc. that evoke disproportionate responses because of their direct or indirect association with the abortion.

 Hope and Healing weekend retreats are held from Friday evening through Sunday afternoon,They offer the opportunity for sustained healing to those who have begun the process of post-abortive healing. In the recollection afforded by silence, retreatants face their abortion experiences and its resulting burdens honestly in the presence of the Eucharistic Heart of Jesus, exposed throughout the weekend on the chapel altar. As they experience Jesus’ healing power in the Eucharist, He reveals His great love and shelters them in His mercy. Such gentleness draws retreatants to trust in His loving concern for them and invites them to release the heavy burden of their sins and wounds into His Sacred Heart, to be consumed by His love and healed by His life. Though the Weekend allows for an exponential increase in healing, the process is normally not completed in a few days. Each individual heals in her own time and in God’s time, with room given for individual response to grace and assistance.

Healing can take as little or as much time as God allows — He is the Healer. Because the time of healing is so individual continued support and healing are offered through continuing post-abortion education, and spiritual guidance through yearly special events such as special Gatherings during Advent and our yearly Mercy Renewal Retreat.

  “AND SO THE LORD GAVE ISRAEL ALL THE LAND HE HAD SWORN TO THEIR FATHERS HE WOULD GIVE THEM. ONCE THEY HAD CONQUERED AND OCCUPIED IT, THE LORD GAVE THEM PEACE ON EVERY SIDE, JUST AS HE HAD PROMISED THEIR FATHERS. NOT ONE OF THEIR ENEMIES COULD WITHSTAND THEM; THE LORD BROUGHT ALL THEIR ENEMIES UNDER THEIR POWER. NOT A SINGLE PROMISE THAT THE LORD MADE TOTHE HOUSE OF ISRAEL WAS BROKEN; EVERYONE WAS FULFILLED.” -Joshua 21:43-45

"Entering Canaan" Days of Prayer & Healing are offered for women, men, siblings of aborted babies and those who aborted because of an adverse diagnosis. The weekends are only offered for women at this time but will be expanded in the future. Anyone wishing to find out more regarding the women can contact Lumina or The Sisters of Life. for the men's, siblings or adverse diagnosis retreats please contact Lumina.

Healing the Deepest Wounds

Healing the Deepest Wounds: A Pastoral Guide to Abortion, Trauma and Grief Paperback – May 29, 2024

by Fr. Ben J. Cameron CPM (Author)

 

 

A new book on healing especially for pastors, counselors andthose who know someone suffering....

Healing the Deepest Wounds, is the go-to resource for those who accompany a woman or a man in the process of healing from the wounds of abortion.

For those hoping to support someone who suffers from the wounds of abortion, this book offers practical insights for both emotional and spiritual healing. It is especially helpful for priests, pastors and counselors.

“What impressed me most about Fr. Cameron’s work is his reminder to women and men involved in the abortion of their child that they are called to holiness. There is hope for them. This work is written with compassion and mercy, faithful to the Gospel, and borne of experience.”
—Most Rev. John M. LeVoir, Bishop Emeritus of New Ulm

Why men need to speak up about abortion

"In a weird way, I owe my life to an abortion."

So goes one of the sentences in this honest piece by Aarom Traister on abortion. Aaron is the sibling of an aborted baby and also a post abortive man. His thought process is not unlike other siblings who feel like they would not be alive were it not for the abortion, or  sense of guilt for living when their sibling did not.

I am sending Aaron the info on our sibling day, and our next men's day who knows, maybe he will come.

In college Aaroms girlfriend had an abortion without telling him. He struggled for years down a self punishing road he had become all too familiar with in his life.

But here is where Aaron goes wrong. In describing his wife he says he owes "Planned Parenthood an unqualified debt of gratitude," for teaching his wife sexual responsibility so that they are now able to share they life they do.

There is no question that Aaron understands the destruction of abortion, he lives it and he has made a call for men to become involved. What he fails to get, is that Planned Parenthood is the leading pusher of abortion, killer of unborn children and destroyer of life. That they exploit minors allowing this life changing decision by young people often without the support of anyone who loves them.

I hope that Aaron truly begins to hear the voices of those of us who are post abortive and who know Planned Parenthood is no hero. How they have destroyed millions of lives. I also pray Aaron finds the support he deserves in working out the hurt and pain from abortion in his own life. I know he can work through it like so many have before him...

 

Why men need to speak up about abortion

For years, I considered it a "female issue." But the truth is, it affected my mom, women I've loved -- and me

By Aaron Traister

iStockphoto/lisegagne

My mother doesn't hide the fact that she had an abortion, but she also does not talk about it freely or with ease. I did not find out that she had an abortion until I was in my mid-20s. Asking her for permission to include her experience in this story was one of the more difficult conversations I've had with her in recent years, but I wanted to, because this conversation has become important to me, a fact I'll explain later.

The story goes like this: A year and a half after my mother and father welcomed my sister into the world, my mother found herself pregnant for the second time. Early in the pregnancy there were complications that put the health of the fetus and my mother at risk. After careful and difficult deliberation my mother and father chose to end the pregnancy. No one was happy about the choice, it was not approached in a cavalier fashion, but my mother and father decided it was the safest course of action, and the one that was in the best interest of the entire family.

read the rest here: http://www.salon.com/news/abortion/?story=/mwt/feature/2011/02/22/men_must_speak_up_on_abortion_debate

Immaculate Heart

Prayer to the Immaculate Heart of Mary from the Entering Canaan Ministry

O Immaculate Heart of Mary,

Mother of Mercy,

you trusted God and opened yourself

to receive the graces you needed to bear Jesus,

your Son and our Merciful Savior.

We know our children are in your care,

held by the same arms that held the Baby Jesus

and loved by your Immaculate Heart.

 Keep us safe beneath your mantle, Mary

and lead us always to your Son

that through your Immaculate Heart

we may come to the Sacred Heart of Jesus

and share eternal life with our children

praising God forever for the mercy & love He has shown us.

Amen

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                             TB

Sacred Heart of Jesus, We trust in You!

Sacred Heart of Jesus, Mercy Himself,

We praise you for the gift of your forgiveness and your great love for us.

 

Help us always to be grateful for your life in us, even when we cannot feel it.

May we always know your presence and trust that you guide our lives.

 

Embraced by your love and joy, may our  babies look down upon us with love

Interceding for us as we seek to live our lives according Your will.

 

 Sacred Heart of Jesus, We trust in You!